Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Spontaneous, happy nostalgia.

Many eons ago (somewhere around my junior year of high school), I was given a copy of Wreck This Journal.  It's an awesome book that encourages creativity and destruction.  Each page has a suggestion of how to destroy it.  I recently found it, and as I go through each page and read every doodle, it's bringing back so many memories.  I wanted to share some of the thoughts and memories.


 This one was fun.  I remember doing this pretty clearly.  I had a lighter in my room for candles and incense.  I went to the bathroom sink because I was afraid.  First I cautiously burned the bottom right corner and blew the flame out - cool!  Then I burned the top right corner, blew it out, and gained confidence.  Then I decided to be cool and burned the center of the page.  It spread quickly and freaked me out.  So I threw the book in the sink and turned on the water, and then I decided to never set fire to anything else ever again.  Besides candles and incense.


 I made a Star of David out of tape and pieces of my hair, because why the heck not?



"my name is kate and I have an electric blue soul!"
"It kind of looks like Ben Duchan wrote this which is sad on his part" (Ben was my best friend. His handwriting was atrocious."
"let's see... douglebutt Swagglebutt poopadoop finklebutt" (these were words that Ben used randomly.  Swagglebutt, as many of you know, is now my internet persona.)
"Hi Kate <3 Merritt" (Merritt wrote that.)
"poopadoop" (again? okay, high school Kate, okay.)
"When I write w/ my Left hand I BUSCUITS" (written by Allison, upside-down for some reason.)

 I remember this day pretty clearly as well.  We were all sitting around the Drama Hall waiting for our director, because we THOUGHT there was rehearsal for our play, but the director never showed up.
"You suck! (not you, Kate) *cries* It has been an hour and 15 min since JFlo was supposed to be here.  He said he thought we wouldn't show up if he didn't post anything on the board.  STUPID DIRECTOR! *cries* *cries*"
I'm pretty sure Merritt wrote that page.  It looks an awful lot like her handwriting.

Out of everything, this one is probably my favorite.  I didn't bother to write much on this page, but what I did write, I love very much. 
"It's Christmas Day 2008 and I love everybody =D then I got some chocolate <3"
"Wall-E is teh b3st movie EVARR! ^_^"
"I <3 Nickie :)"
Okay, that last one isn't really accurate anymore, as Nickie was my high school boyfriend.  But it's still just such a nice little page.  Such nice thoughts.

 "well it mostly smells like burning, but I tried using Dragon's Blood incense." - 1/5/09
"cherry hemp lotion!" -1/8/09
Sadly, five years later, neither scent has stuck.  The page just smells like paper.  This page is sliced because a previous page says to cut through several layers of the book.


 This is from the same day as the Negative Thoughts page. 
"24 minutes since Jody was supposed to be here.  Freshmen doing Jumping Jacks.  Now Jody is 31 minutes late... Merritt trying to find his number"
"now he's 47 minutes late.  Merritt is going to sew my book." (there is a page that says "Sew this page!")
"45 minutes late. he's not coming."
"53 minutes late! we're waiting for our parents to get us."
"now it's been 91 minutes and I'm home and Jody sucks."
It's worth noting that this means we Drama Kids sat around in the school for an hour after school ended, waiting for rehearsal.  Because we were all so committed to theater that waiting around for AN HOUR when we could be home snacking, doing homework, or watching TV was totally acceptable.


 The title page.  (Sorry that these pictures are so out of order.)  Allison drew a little dude shouting "I'M A PURPLE!"  And she drew the little farting guy.  I'm pretty sure I did the rest on this page. 


The first instructions page.  It's pretty hectic, but allow me to guide you through the chaos.
First drawing you have is a red toaster with a piece of toast in it, then in blue it says "there's a button on the side if it pops up too soon push down again MAKE TOAST!"  It's from a song that some radio DJs make up or something.  I was pretty obsessed with it for a while in high school.
There's a giant piece of toast with melty orange butter in the middle.  Not sure why, probably because of the YEAH TOAST thing.
A little green cucumber thing, it's from Family Guy when Peter Griffin tries to create a dancing cucumber toy that's basically a vibrating dildo.
Along the side is a kitty that Merritt drew.
Someone - maybe Allison? - wrote "sparta!"
Several different types of smiley faces.
and at the bottom, I drew a Star of David, wrote yay, and filled in a few of the letters.

So there you have it, some highlights from my copy of Wreck This Journal.  It was a really fun journey down memory lane looking through the pages of this book.  And there are enough empty, undamaged pages left for me to make more memories!

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Commercials targeting women suck. A lot.

Recently I saw this Upworthy post about tampon ads.  The tampon ad they show is pretty great - it's about a little girl who gets her period at a summer camp, and she's the only one with pads and tampons so she gives them out to every girl who gets her period.  But then, the other girls start receiving products from Hello Flo, which is apparently a tampon delivery service. 

But the part that made me think was the text that the poster wrote.  Tampon and pad ads completely obscure periods.  They show happy women going for a jog or a swim, and they drip blue liquid onto pads.  It totally stigmatizes periods.

And then I started thinking.  Just about every ad for women's "issues" completely ignores the real issue, avoids the topic, and therefore stigmatizes things that women experience.

Hair removal ads suck.  The legs that they shave to demonstrate the product are already perfectly smooth.  How are you supposed to know how well a razor or shaving cream works if they don't actually show it working?  More importantly, why can't they show a woman with at least stubbly, if not hairy, legs on TV?  What's so terrifying about that?  It's not like it's a dirty thing that kids shouldn't know about.  Obscuring meds for erectile dysfunction makes sense because people don't want kids asking questions.  But leg hair is totally natural and not harmful or sexual.

As a young teen with no thoughts about sex outside of "I hope I'll never hear my parents doing it," I saw a commercial for the birth control patch.  But of course I had no idea what it was.  They never used the words "birth control" or "pregnant."  All I remember about it is stuff like "don't worry about it falling off" and "it goes on your hip so it's very discrete!"  I assumed it was a quit smoking patch that was for women.  It was actually years before I learned about the birth control patch and connected the dots.  That one is a little more understandable, because like ED meds, birth control is a topic that most parents don't want to discuss with young kids or preteens who are curious.  But still.  Why is there such a stigma around women's concerns?

The only commercials involving products for women that never dances around the issue is makeup and skincare.  "YOUR SKIN SUCKS, DOESN'T IT?  BUY OUR PRODUCT TO MAKE YOU BEAUTIFUL!"  "HOLY CRAP YOU'RE GETTING WRINKLES?  ABOMINATION!  BUY OUR PRODUCT!"  "LIPS TOO SMALL?  BUY OUR LIPSTICK THAT MAKES YOUR LIPS SWELL UP."  "HAIR GRAYING?  BUY OUR PRODUCT!"

Moral of the story: society thinks anything natural is gross.  Society wants women to feel ashamed for having leg hair and periods.  But don't buy into it.  Remember that periods, leg hair, wrinkles, gray hair, and various skin imperfections are natural.  You don't have to like any of those things (I don't, except for my leg hair), but for your own sake, accept them as part of being human and consider not being as insecure about yourself as commercials and TV want you to be.

Sunday, April 20, 2014

I'm coming out as a woman with hairy legs.

Like most girls in our society, I started shaving my legs around the time I started puberty.  For me, it was sparked by a certain important person in my life, who is older than I, seeing me in shorts and saying, "Katie [because I was Katie then], you should start shaving your legs!"  I recall a certain other important person in my life telling the former that I'd start shaving my legs when I was ready to, and that I didn't need anyone telling me when to start.

Since then, I have shaved my legs.  All. the. time.  Every other day during shorts season.  In middle and high school, I'd even shave my legs every other day during the winter, because I had to change my pants in the locker room, and I didn't want anyone seeing me with hairy legs.  In college, I felt the freedom to go about a week between shaves during the winter.

And I've never liked shaving.  I don't exactly enjoy most of my hygienic routine, but it's definitely satisfying to wash my hair, brush my teeth, and wash my body.  I feel better after doing so.  But shaving my legs has never felt that way to me.  Touching my freshly-shaved legs is nice, but it doesn't last long enough to really feel worth the effort.  And I'm super pale.  My hair is super dark.  So even minutes after shaving, my legs still looked a little stubbly.  Shaving over my knees gives them horrible razor burn, even once a week.  About halfway through the summer, every year, my knees hurt just from gentle touches because the razor burn gets so bad.  I usually develop ingrown hairs that form even more painful bumps on my knees in the summer, too.

But this summer, I'm not going to shave my legs.

I got really lazy this winter, and I was also really cold.  I knew that if I shaved my week-old leg hairs, they'd be noticeably colder when I went outside, and I didn't want any of that.  I also knew that the longer I waited to shave, the longer it would take to shave.  And every time I thought about shaving my legs, I just felt such an overwhelming desire to get out of the shower.  So I did.

And now, the more I stare at my hairy legs, the more I like them.  I mean, it is a little weird.  The hairs on my shins are a lot longer than the hairs on the backs of my calves.  A trim would be nice.   

When I first considered keeping my leg hair, I thought about the stigma behind it.  Let's face it.  Most women with hairy legs are looked at as either dirty hippies, dirty hipsters, lesbians, or transgender female-to-male.  Even if they're not any of those things.  It's stupid, but I was afraid that showing off my hairy legs would make people think that I was dirty.  Even though I know that I'm not!  I bathe regularly.  Just because I don't shave my legs doesn't mean I don't wash them.

I tested how I felt in public by going to the grocery store in shorts.  I haven't made any friends in my new state, and I work with only one person who lives 11 miles away, so I knew I wouldn't run into anyone I know.  Driving there felt weird.  With my windows down, I could feel my leg hairs billowing in the wind.  I've gotten used to that walking around at home, but to feel it in the car was a new experience.

Walking around the store felt so unbelievably liberating.  I looked at people's faces as I passed them, and most of them didn't even look down at my legs.  Granted, at the grocery store people tend to be buried in their shopping lists and the shelves in front of them.  But still, to walk around in public and not feel those dirty looks I expected was awesome.

I might shave my legs for special occasions, but I also might not.  I've spent my entire post-puberty life making sure to shave my legs for special occasions that take place during dress/shorts season.  I've only spent three months (or something) as someone who can't be bothered to shave her legs, and it's only been one month since I decided to be someone who doesn't even care to shave her legs again.  Will the societal pressures in my family lead me to shave my legs before my nephew's upcoming first birthday celebration?  Nah.  If anyone in my family actually cares, I'll have some carefully chosen words for them.  Will the societal pressures in the world lead me to shave my legs for a job interview if I wear a skirt to it?  Maybe.  Hopefully not.  If the person interviewing me is going to judge me for having hairy legs, I don't want to work for them.  Will I want smooth legs for my wedding?  Right now, yes, I think I will.  But I'm not even engaged right now.  Maybe, hopefully, by the time I get married, I'll be so used to my leg hairs that I won't feel less princess-bride-like with them.

Friday, April 4, 2014

I want to love the HIMYM finale, but here's why I can't

I know that everybody and their brother has written about why they did or did not like the series finale of How I Met Your Mother.  It's been talked to death, but now it's time for me to put in my two cents. 

It goes without saying that this post has a buttload of spoilers, so if you haven't seen the finale and you've managed to not find out what happened, please don't read on.

So, Ted and Robin end up together.  It's supposed to be gooey and romantic, and Voiceover Ted talks about how his whole life has been a long journey that led him to where he is now and he wouldn't change any of it.  That's a really sweet sentiment and I generally like that kind of thing in a TV show.

But I HATE that Ted ends up with Robin.

This whole show - NINE YEARS - that's over two THIRDS of my life - Voiceover Ted has been telling his kids and the TV audience that his life was a journey that led him to The Mother.  He starts the story with where he met Robin because he felt like that was where his Journey began.  "Dad, it feels like you've been going on about this for a year!  Why hasn't mom come in yet?"  "Because, this is about the journey to her."  And because the show had to last for more than one season.  That's awesome.

But what's NOT awesome is to tell us for NINE. YEARS. that this whole story, the whole show, Ted's whole life, was leading him to The Mother and then, in the last 20 minutes of the show, turn it into a journey that led him to Robin.  Fuck that.  I'm sorry, but really.  You're going to spend nine years giving us hints about The Mother, showing us her ankle, giving Ted her umbrella, having Ted date her roommate, having her show up in a class that he thought he was supposed to teach, only to have him end up with the woman who, for the last seven years, has proven to be not only not The Mother, but not even a good match for Ted?  Make it seem like The Mother was just a pit stop on Ted's way to Robin?

And there's another thing.  We just spent the last nine months, the whole last season, at Barney and Robin's wedding.  And in the first 20 minutes of the finale, you tell us that they got a divorce.  Thanks for punching us in the face right before you punch us in the gut.  Yeah, it's cool that Barney says "It's not a failed marriage, it's an awesome marriage that ended."  In fact I really liked that.  But COME ON.  A whole season at a wedding just to have the marriage end 20 minutes later (three years in the timeline of the show).

And then, there's the reason for their divorce.  Robin was traveling too much.  She wasn't ready to settle down anywhere.  That's part of why she drifted out of the gang's life.  So we're just supposed to assume that, at the very end of the show, she's magically decided to settle down and that's why she and Ted are finally right for each other?  Bull shit.  I mean, sure, she has an apartment and five dogs again, so maybe she really has settled down.  But there are some things that you need to TELL the viewer.  Have Robin say somewhere before Ted goes over there with the blue French Horn, "All that traveling was getting to me so I finally decided to take a job that will keep me in New York."  Just to make it more clear that Robin and Ted are finally at the right place at the right time.

It just feels like the writers didn't even care about the viewers in the last episode.  Apparently, a lot of the story was inspired by the writers' actual lives, so that's cool.  But some of us don't WANT a more realistic ending.  Some of us don't CARE that maybe something similar to this happened to an actual person.  Some of us just spent nine years wondering who The Mother was and we didn't WANT her to be dead (although that has been a theory since about halfway through season one).  And lots of us - me included - did NOT want Ted and Robin to end up together simply because they knew that they were not right for each other by the end of season two.

There were a lot of awesome moments, though.  Lots of things I did like about the finale.

Ted's goodbye to Lily made me cry.  It was so silly and Alyson Hannigan looked so sad - I imagined that maybe that was the last scene they filmed with Alyson, so maybe those tears were real because this was the last time the cast and crew would be together.  (I like to imagine this kind of thing because I want to work in sitcom.)

The Captain Ahab/White Whale costumes.  Oh my god, amazing.  But why the HELL was Ted wearing the Hanging Chad costume?!  He wore that to try to find the Slutty Pumpkin.  He found her.  He didn't like her.  He should have done an awesome couples costume with The Mother, but no, he was in a costume that he wore in order to search for some other woman.  dafuq.

Barney seeing his daughter for the first time.  Oh god, all the feels.  I pictured NPH seeing his babies for the first time, and imagined that he was channeling that feeling.  Tears.

Ted finally talking to The Mother for the first time.  Super adorable.  I actually expected them to kiss because there had already been so many scenes of them together.

Ted bringing Robin the blue French horn was really sweet.  As much as I hate that they're together, I do like that he brought her the horn again.  It's like they're starting over, rather than picking up where they left off.  Which is good, because they technically left off with Robin being a terrible friend and abandoning everybody, even for all of their Big Moments.

The clips of everybody from way back in season one made me start to cry so hard that I actually had to get up and walk away, thinking "I can't handle this."  Partly because I'm ridiculously emotional.  Partly because I was watching it with Derek (my boyfriend), and he always teases me for crying at shows and that just makes me feel silly for crying which, of course, makes me cry harder.  But mostly, because it brought me back to season one.  Back to 13 year old me, in the ninth grade, excitedly watching this new show with Willow from Buffy.  It made me feel like a kid again, and that hit me with so many emotions that I'm getting choked up just writing about it.

So, if you want to know my opinion overall, whether or not I liked the finale for How I Met Your Mother.... I'm generally okay with it.  It was a good episode, a solid ending to the show... it just didn't end the way I wanted it to.

In any case, it was 500 times better than the ending to Dexter.

Friday, March 28, 2014

13 Things that Cold Sores Completely Ruin

So, for starters, yes, I have oral herpes.  It's not even exciting.  I've had it since before I knew what STDs were, and since way way WAY before I even had my first kiss.  I didn't associate cold sores with herpes until high school.  So for me, there's no stigma about it.  I could ramble on about that, but that's way too serious for this post.  This post is more long the lines of a Funny Buzzfeed List kind of thing.

Here are 13 Things that Cold Sores Completely Ruin.

 

1. Kissing.

 

 
(two-views.com)
 
 If you're single and not dating, you are luckily exempt from this one.  But for the past few days, I haven't been able to kiss my long-term, live-with boyfriend, and it's been killing me.  I keep turning to him and going in for a kiss, and he jumps away from me - as well he should, since I don't want to give him herpes - but it makes me sad to have my boyfriend jump away from a kiss.


2. Drinking - especially acidic things or hot things.

(dailymail.co.uk)
I love me some orange juice.  I love me some hot beverages when it's cold out.  But when a cold sore is big enough, and especially if it's on my bottom lip, holding a cup to my lip hurts.  It's awful.  So I have to stick my tongue out and pretend like it's my bottom lip, which makes me look like a fool.  The easiest solution is to use a straw, which is fine for cold/room temperatures, but it's not a good idea when drinking hot cider or tea (or coffee, for those of you weirdos who like it).

 3. Eating a sandwich.


(bubblews.com)
 
Most of the time, sammiches are kind of tall.  Bread + toppings + another slice of bread = height.  So you have to open your mouth kinda wide to eat them.  But OH WAIT, that's gonna hurt like hell with a giant blister on your lip!  Eat nothing but peanut butter and jelly or eat NOTHING AT ALL until that thing heals.

4. Eating pretty much anything in general.

(superstock.com) 
The day I got my most recent cold sore, it didn't really pop up into a full-fledged blister until dinner time.  What did I make for dinner that night?  Spaghetti and meatballs.  Something that is both very gigantic-bite-eating (for me) and very slurp-y.  So I risked not only hurting my cold sore, but also getting the ointment I use on it all over my food and fork, which means I'd taste it, which isn't fun.  Some lip products taste okay (like my mint Burt's Bee's chapstick, mmm), but cold sore ointment is NOT on that list.  They all taste like crap.  So, when you eat, you can either wipe it off of your lip and eat with a DRY cold sore (no thanks), or you can leave the ointment on and ruin the flavor of your food.  It's your choice.

5. Spitting.


(telegraph.co.uk) 
With a cold sore on your bottom lip (where most of mine always are), it hurts to purse your lips very much.  So when I brush my teeth or hack the occasional loogie, spitting it out ends up being this sad little dribble.  Kind of like when I got my wisdom teeth taken out and wasn't allowed to create suction in my mouth.  Except instead of risking uplifting my stitches, it physically hurts my lip to actually spit.  Oh, and spitting out minty toothpaste?  Stings like a mother.

6. Whistling.


(braodwayspotted.com)
Similar to spitting, the way you have to purse your lips to whistle hurts with a cold sore.  And I like to whistle.  If my music has a rockin' trumpet solo, or if I'm listening to Jethro Tull, I like to whistle along.  But I can't with a cold sore, and that makes me sad.

7. Smiling.


(marklevydds.com)
I love to smile!  I love to laugh.  I love to be happy.  But with a cold sore, spreading my lips that much hurts!  So I laugh for two seconds until my blister starts to split, and then I get sad.  It sucks.  It feels like my cold sore is literally preventing my from being happy.

8. Pictures.

(yep, this is a selfie of ME.)
I like to be in pictures.  But when you have a cold sore, a) it hurts to smile like I said above, and b) you feel like all anyone sees on you is a giant blister on your lip that screams "LOOK AT ME!!!"

9. Showering/washing your face.

(blog.mollyskincare.com)

I don't know about you, but when I wash my face, I rub my hands all over my face.  None of that "gentle water caressing my face" crap you see in skin care commercials.  And when I shower, the water hits my face a lot - including my lips.  So what happens when I have a cold sore?  I have to awkwardly angle my face down in the shower, to keep the harsh water off of my lip; and I have to be really awkward about not touching my lips when I wash my face, because I don't want to rub my cold sore and irritate it.  Boo.

10.  Putting on chapstick (or other lip products).

(allure.com)
Putting chapstick on with a cold sore, you have to maneuver the chapstick around the sore.  That in itself isn't so bad, especially since most of my cold sores are in the corner of my mouth rather than smack in the middle.  But!  When I put chapstick on, I like to do a nice lip rub to rub in the chapstick.  Not doing that feels as weird to me as just rubbing a thick coat of lotion over my hand once and not actually rubbing it in.  Of course you can't do that with a cold sore!  Because a) it hurts the cold sore to be rubbed against my other lip, and b) it smears the cold sore ointment all over my other lip.  (I usually put the ointment on before the chapstick, I'm not really sure why.)  This all holds true for lip stick and lip gloss, as well, except even worse because those things have to be rubbed in to help distribute color evenly!  Luckily for me, I don't wear either of those very often - I'm generally a makeup-less face.
Subsequently...

11. The rest of your lips.

 
(keep-healthy.com)
If I can't put chapstick on properly, the rest of my lips get very dry and chapped and generally unpleasant.  The other day, when I first got my most recent cold sore, I actually sat in front of the mirror and peeled off all of my dry lip skin so I didn't have to feel all of those flakies all day.  Gross, I know, but cold sores are gross and they ruin everything. 

12. Swimming

(wikimedia.org)
Whether it's leisurely or for exercise/competition, swimming hurts a cold sore.  All that water dries it out ridiculously.  Constantly coming in and out of the water irritates it.  The chlorine of a pool or the salt of the ocean stings like a mother!  And if you're at an outside body of water in the sun, OW BURN.  Even with an SPF chapstick, the heat burns.  One time, when my cold sore had gone from blister to scab (part of the healing process), I decided to jump off of the high dive at a pool.  I felt like I was going to land way too close to some people, so I tried to maneuver myself over in the air.  Unfortunately this caused my cannonball-posed body to land not on my feet/butt, but RIGHT ON MY FACE.  WITH A COLD SORE.  It hurt sooooo badly.  It started bleeding immediately so I had to get out of the pool.  And I didn't have my normal ointment that I use (Carmex for Cold Sores) - all I had was this special medicated stuff, which is great for the blister stage but doesn't moisturize enough for the scab stage.  So the stuff STUNG LIKE A BITCH on my open, bleeding cold sore.  Day. ruined.

And finally...

13. Running and other exercise.

(hiit.com)
This one may just be me, but when my heart rate goes up, it causes my cold sores to pulse painfully.  Add that to the bouncing of running and I'm giving up after less than two minutes.  Plus, all that breathing through my mouth really dries out a cold sore, and I don't want to have to put ointment on with sweaty hands.

Think of another thing that cold sores completely ruin?  Leave me an angry comment calling me an idiot for forgetting the number one most important thing that cold sores ruin!  Just kidding.  Do feel free to leave a comment, but please don't call me an idiot or anything else horrible.

 

 

Life Lessons from John Robertson

My high school orchestra teacher had a huge impact on my life.  And it wasn't just because he was an outstanding conductor.  According to my older siblings, the orchestra teacher before him was so awful that the higher-talent orchestra, the one you had to audition for, sounded like crap.

Then Mr. Robertson came along, and he turned both levels of orchestra around so hard that you'd barely recognize it was from the same school.  The lower-level orchestra sounded better than the higher-level one did under the old conductor.

In my time as his student, he set a five-year goal for himself as a conductor: to bring an orchestra to State Festivals that would bring in 1s across the board.  (For those who aren't familiar, 1 is the highest rating you can achieve.  There are five categories, each rated 1-5, and then your total score is averaged.)

He pulled that off in one year.

Oh, and he does this awesome Kermit the Frog impression that's really accurate and always good for a laugh.

So yeah.  Mr. Robertson is a phenomenal conductor.

But to me, he was so much more than an orchestra teacher.  He managed to intertwine long-lasting life lessons with teaching music.  Sure, you could argue that music is a long-lasting part of your life, and I'd agree with you, but Mr. Robertson's teachings were far more than that.  It's been almost five years since I had him as a teacher, and yet some of the things he said still resonate in my life today.  Oh, and due to schedule conflicts, I haven't even played my viola in over a year - and yet, my high school string teacher's lessons still affect my every day life.

So what was it about these lessons that stuck with me?  Was it just "hard work pays off, practice makes perfect, music is life"?  Well, yes.  But it was so, so much more than that.

Practice Makes Permanent


We've all heard it before.  "Practice makes perfect!"  Encouraging all people to practice whatever it is that they want to do, so that one day they'll be great at it.  Mr. Robertson used to tell us this.  But over time, as he consistently heard the same people making mistakes or playing out of tune, he realized that the saying is wrong.

He drew us a little diagram with a target where your finger should go on the string for a note.  Obviously, you want to hit the "bullseye" every time so that you play in tune.  Then he drew the same target again, only with dots all over the place; this is the diagram of a person who doesn't practice and is sometimes sharp, sometimes flat, and rarely in tune.  But then he drew another diagram, and that one represented someone who consistently hits the note wrong, but always in the same place on the string.  It was then that he said this to us: "Practice makes permanent."

If you practice something very often, but are always practicing it wrong, you are never going to magically get it right one day.  You must practice something correctly in order for practice to make you perfect.

But if you practice something incorrectly, all you're doing is making your mistakes permanent.


Nickle and Diming


This one is a little more commonly known about, but it was the first time I actually heard the phrase.  One day, we just kept talking.  I don't even remember what we kept talking about - probably business things, like practice charts, upcoming performances, songs we'd like to play; I imagine we birdwalked a little and ended up talking about pop culture or something as well.  Maybe we talked about our school and the way it worked.  I don't even know.  In any case, we would play a little, talk a little, play a little, and talk some more.  Our school had block scheduling, so each class period was 90 minutes long.  This was both good and bad; it was a nice, long period, but it also kind of made you feel like you had all the time in the world.  So you birdwalk and talk about non-class things, you stop playing for 3 minutes at a time in a music class, and you think there's still plenty of time to rehearse the next song, and all of a sudden the bell is ringing and everybody has to rush around to pack up their instruments and make it to the next class on time.

So, as we're taking another chat break, Mr. Robertson brings up the phrase nickel and diming.  When you spend 5 cents or 10 cents at a time, you don't think anything of it, but suddenly after a few weeks you realize you're out $50.  If you waste time a few minutes at a time, you think you'll be fine, but after a whole day you realize you've probably lost about 1-2 hours of work time.

Don't nickel and dime your time away or you'll end up missing out on something important.


Once Means You Were Lucky; Twice Means You Can Do It Again


This is probably one of my favorite teaching techniques of Mr. Robertson's.  Occasionally, if there was a particualrly difficult section in a piece, he would go section-by-section or even person-by-person to make sure everyone could do it.  First violins, play measures 8-12 for me.  Try it again.  There you go, you got it!  Try it once more.  Awesome.  Second violins, you're having a really hard time with measures 15-18.  Let's have each person play them.  Great Amanda, you got it!  Try it again.  Yes!  Good job!

Whenever you're struggling with something, you practice it.  If you get it once, that's great, but you might have just been lucky.  Maybe your fingers stumbled in the right direction this time, or maybe you fell but landed perfectly by chance.

Whatever you're doing, when you get it right, do it again to make sure you actually know what you're doing.  And if you can do it a third time, that means you've really got it down.



On a related note...

When You Perfect Something That You Were Struggling With, You Not Only Grow As A Musician, You Grow As A Person


This was another thing Mr. Robertson would tell us to encourage us to practice.  If there's a few measures, a whole section, or an entire piece that you just can't play, you play it over and over again until you can get it right.  And when you've finally conquered those notes, you know you've gotten better at it, which means you've grown as a musician.  This piece used to be hard for you, but now it's easy.  But you also grow as a person.

Something used to be hard, and now you made it easy.  You can feel more confident in yourself knowing that you're good enough to learn, grow, and fix your mistakes.

 

Cheating On Something Is Only Cheating Yourself


Because it was high school, we had to have grades from written things.  Rather than assign us bullshit papers or worksheets, we simply had to turn in weekly practice charts, signed by a parent, to show that we've been practicing.  Easy enough if you actually practice when your parents are home to hear you.  But what about people who don't practice?  They either don't turn in practice charts, which lowers their grade (and come on, who doesn't get an A in orchestra?), or they forge their parent's signature and lie about practicing.

Obviously, Mr. Robertson didn't care enough to prove it by calling parents and asking them if their kid was actually practicing.  But, to discourage lying and encourage practicing, he warned us that the only person we're cheating is ourself.  Yeah, we get a grade that we don't deserve, but in lying about practicing, we've cheated ourselves out of getting better as musicians.

So if you're on a diet, but you really want that doughnut, go ahead and eat it and don't report it to your calorie tracker app.  But who loses in that scenario?  The app, which knows nothing but the numbers you give it; or the person who eats an extra 350 calories?

Cheating on tests is risky, because if you get caught you could get expelled or suspended.  But if you do cheat, and you don't get caught, who loses out?  The teacher who got one pulled over them, the kid you cheated off of who actually knew the material, or you, who only learned that the answer to number 6 was D?

Never cheat or take the easy way out.  The only person who is truly cheated is you, and there's no point. 


So, Mr. Robertson, I don't know if you'll ever read this or hear about it, but thank you.  You taught me how to be a better viola player, and in doing so you taught me how to be a better person.  My life is better having been touched by yours, and I hope that your future students will realize just how lucky they are to have you as a teacher.